Personal Development

What?

The cost for the average college degree is $122,000

Yep, you read that right, $122,000. That’s a lot of money. Especially when it costs the same to take Economics as it does elective classes like Intro to kayaking. That’s highway robbery and proof that the higher education system in America is broken.

But that’s another rant for another day.

But what if colleges and universities offered elective classes that actually prepared students for real life? Taught them some skills they will need to survive and thrive.

Paying for classes like that might go down easier than these classes that actually exist:

• Demystifying the Hipster at Tufts University, Medford, MA
• Patternmaking for dog garments at Fashion Institute of Technology, N.Y.
• Juggling at Reed College, Portland, Oregon
• The sociology of Miley Cyrus at Skidmore College, Saratoga Springs, N.Y.

AND NUMBER ONE

How to watch television at Montclair State University, Montclair, N.J.

So What?

The problem with classes like this is not that they are bad, they’re just worthless. It’s hard to imagine how a man would be better prepared to be a great welder or engineer because he took The sociology of Miley Cirus. The course is a waste of time. The only person who benefits from it is the professor who wrote the text that no one else bought but his students are required to.

Now What?

Here are four classes I think should be taught in college

1. Money Management

This class is first on the list because there is a direct correlation between how you handle money and your attitude about the world and life in general. Men need to know the sooner they get serious about managing money, the less stressful their life will be.

Every guy needs to learn how to manage money or as Dave Ramsey says, learn how to tell their money where to go instead of wondering where it went.

Main objectives of this course:

• Learn the importance of emergency funds and how to start one
• Develop a spending plan, AKA budget instead of crossing your fingers and hoping you’ve got enough money in your account when it’s time pay the rent
• Learn how to make compound interest your friend instead of your enemy

2. Taxes

One of my favorite episodes of “That 70’s Show” is when Jackie gets her first paycheck. She looks at the check then goes to the manager and says “I don’t know who FICA is but that bitch stole like 10% of my money.” As the old saying goes, the only sure-things in life are death and taxes, so every man needs to know about them.

There’s a bonus to taking the class, nothing will influence how you vote more than what you know about taxes.

Main objectives of this course:

• Know how the government spends your taxes
• Learn how to fill out a tax return
• Know the difference between tax avoidance (highly recommended) and tax evasion (a felony and something to steer clear of).

3. Time Management 

Managing money may be number 1 on this list, but the truth is time is the most valuable asset you have. Every man gets 168 hours per week but some guys get so much done, it’s like they got extra hours. They don’t, they just know how to manage their 168 hours.

Main objectives of this course:

• Develop the skills necessary to stay productive when there’s no one looking over your shoulder, like working from home
• Learn how often should you step away from the internet, social media and YouTube
• Know the difference between taking a break (highly recommended) and procrastination (which will get you fired)

4. Car Maintenance 

As you’ve probably figured out by now, a car is the second-largest purchase most men will ever make, so you need to know how to take care of it. The good news is most cars are so well built, you can easily put 100,000 miles on one and it will still be as reliable as when it was new. You don’t have to spend hours every week working on your car, there are just a few basic maintenance items you need to stay on top of.

The main objectives of this course:

• Learn The ONE task that can either make your car last longer or wear out way before it’s time; oil changes. Most cars made in the last few years only require changing the oil every 10,000 miles so there’s no excuse to let this one slide,
• Understand that rotating your tires every 5k miles takes 30 minutes but will help your tires will last twice as long.
• Learn how to keep your car clean.

Now What?

Can you imagine what teaching those four classes to every college student would do? There would be fewer men wasting this lives, going broke, getting fired or being stranded on the side of the road because they didn’t put oil in their car and the engine blew up.

In other words, we’d have a generation of men prepared to get a job, start a family, and then begin making the world a better place for all of us.

PS

I’m always looking for ideas to write about. If you’ve got a topic you want me to cover, leave a comment or send me an email at dee@252men.com.

 

A hot topic on social media is the question “what defines a real man”?

A lot of very loud voices are saying it doesn’t even matter because men are the enemy. But just because they are loud doesn’t mean they are the majority. According to a recent article in the New York Post it’s just the opposite. Most women are looking for what I could call a real man.

from the article “It’s a mismatch between what progressive women say they want and what they actually respond to,” Miller told me. “Women’s instinctive mate preferences have evolved for hundreds of thousands of years for guys who are competent, strong, good providers, good protectors and happy with a sexual division of labor,” he added. Women want “decisive men who are also compassionate and thoughtful.”

So what do I mean when I talk about a real man? What are the traits all real men have? These 5 C”s

Character

Don’t confuse character with reputation. Your reputation is what people think you are. Character is what you are when no one else is looking. This means you’re the only person who knows if you have high character or not. The guy you shave with is giving you a character assessment every  day.

Chemistry

Do you try to get along with the people in your life? Are you a good neighbor, a good coworker, a good boss, are you working to be part of your community? A real man is looking to be part of a team because he wants to add value to the people he’s around.

Competence

Are you good at your job? Are you working to get better? A real man takes pride in the quality of his work

Courage

Colonel Art Athens taught me this definition of courage, “will you make tough decisions even if it cost you personally?” A real man is not afraid to make a tough decision. He also doesn’t put how the decision will impact him at the top of the list of considerations when he’s making a decision.

Compassion

This means every time I look at another person, I ask myself one, simple question, “What’s best for them?” in the current situation. Do I respond or ignore, do I confront or extend grace? That’s compassion.

Those 5 C’s are what makes a real man. And these 5 C’s are what’s on my checklist to evaluate how I’m doing as I work to become a real man and they will help you too.

 

Do you love Donald Trump or loathe him?

Are you a conservative or a progressive politically?

No matter how you answered, have you ever thought about how you got the opinions and beliefs you have? And are they permanent or do they change? And if they do change, what causes the change, time or is it based on who and what you listen to?

This is a good topic for men to think about because we’re not nearly as logical as we think we are. The truth is men make most decisions based on emotion then search until they find facts to justify them. And that’s why you need to think about how much the emotions we use to make decisions are shaped by what we listen to and who we listen to.

Gary Vaynerchuk posted this set of Apple EarPods he autographed for a fan.

 

 

This idea isn’t original to Gary Vaynerchuk, a guy named Solomon was trying to teach this to his son a few thousand years ago:

“Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble.”

Proverbs‬ ‭13:20‬ ‭NLT‬‬‬‬‬‬

 

What Solomon and Vaynerchuk are saying is you can control your emotions by controlling who and what you listen to.

Here’s what I’m talking about.

I don’t like Rachel Maddow. Not only are her political beliefs the complete opposite of mine, but her voice is also like fingernails on a chalkboard to me. Any time I see her on a screen, even if it’s just a 20 second clip on twitter, I feel myself getting pissed.

So what do I do?

I don’t watch her.

But I still need and want to know what people who think differently than me are saying about an issue. Why? An important part of forming an intelligent opinion about a topic is to examine it from all sides. So there are a few writers and podcasters I check out instead of Rachel Maddow. That way I educate myself without spiking my blood pressure.

BTW, I don’t understand the people who sit around watching someone they hate on TV. It’s like they enjoy being pissed. But that’s an unhealthy way to live. Men are not designed to be perpetually pissed off. It causes high blood pressure, digestive issues, and generally makes you a pain in the butt to be around.

But back to what I was saying.

Now I hear you thinking “This is crap. I make my own decisions, not my emotions. And sometimes I’m in a bad mood because my job sucks, my boss is a jerk, the kids are driving me nuts, and I’m broke. Not because of who I hang out with or what I listen to.”

Ok, you up for a challenge?

Step One

Make a list of the podcasts, radio stations, tv shows, and newscasts you listen to.

Step Two

Write down the names of the people you spend the most time with.

Step Three

Now consider what you think about topics such as:

• Trump good or Trump Bad
• Biden good or Biden Bad
• Masks or no-mask
• There is a God or there is no God
• Truth is conditional or truth is absolute
• Systemic racism is real or not
• Progressive policies or conservative are the best hope for the future

Now for the experiment. Change what you listen to.

Are you a CNN guy, then switch to Fox? If you listen to Joe Rogan’s podcasts, switch to Ben Shapiro (or my podcast). Switch off talk radio and start listening to music. Hang out with some people you’ve avoided because their politics are different than yours.

Do it for 60 days then come back and answer the questions in step three again.

Did your opinions change? Maybe not totally but I bet your stance has moderated on some topics you once were rock solid on.

My point is not to get you to change what you believe but to understand how critical it is to pay attention to who and what you listen to.

I’m not saying you should only listen to people you already agree with. I want to challenge you to get a balanced diet so you’ll have the facts to form your own opinion.

Here’s some of the ways I get a balanced diet of information. When it comes to reading, I rely on the Scriptures as the only truly reliable source but I augment that with writers like Matt Taib. I spend $10 a month to subscribe to Apple News so I have easy access to a broad range of news and opinions. I read The Wall Street Journal, USA Today, Newsweek, AL.com for local news. I listen to the Breaking Points with Krystal and Saagar podcast because one of them is conservative and the other is progressive. I think this gives me all of the information I need to form a intelligent opinion.

To wrap it up, I want you to know that if you want to change who you are now to a better version of yourself over the next few years, keep an eye on who and what you listen to.

 

“those who dance are thought mad by those who hear not the music.”

Nobody knows who said this first but it should resonate with any man who is a follower of Jesus. Men who take their orders from the Holy Spirit will do some stuff that will make his family and friends think he’s crazy. Which makes sense because God spoke to them, not their friends and family.

You can read one story of when God told a guy to do something a lot of people would think is crazy in Genesis 6:

“So God said to Noah, …..“Build a large boat from cypress wood and waterproof it with tar, inside and out. Then construct decks and stalls throughout its interior.” ‭‭Genesis‬ ‭6:13-14‬ ‭NLT‬‬

So Noah built a boat in the middle of the desert just because God told him to. Noah didn’t hear music that nobody else did, he heard God when nobody else did.

Have you ever thought about what Noah’s neighbors were saying while he was working on his giant boat? Here’s a clip from “Evan Almighty”, that’s probably pretty close

 

Or how Noah’s wife reacted? One more clip of how that might go.

 

I’ve had a few experiences like this and I can tell you the closer you walk with God, the more likely some people will think you’re nuts.

One thing I’ve learned is God speaks in a whisper. He doesn’t post it on Facebook or twitter, He whispers.

Why?

Think about what you do when you’re trying to hear someone when they whisper. You lean forward. You turn your head to one side. You block out everything and everybody around you and focus on what they are saying.

I think that’s why God whispers. He wants your undivided attention. In fact, that’s a great way to tell if something is from God. Like what Oswald Chambers wrote

“I know when the proposition comes from God because of its quiet persistence.”

Whispers from God are awesome. Be on the lookout for them. Pay attention to them. Then listen to the whisper because that’s where God-sized dreams begin.

“We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer.” Proverbs‬ ‭16:1‬ ‭NLT‬

Big Idea Worth sharing- too many men are highly educated but unprepared to handle the tasks it takes to live day to day. That’s why schools should teach more practical classes. 

When I was in college I had to take elective courses that were really just ways for the school to extract more tuition and for me to pad my GPA. It never made sense to me the tuition for my Statistics class was the same as Intro to Karate. If colleges are going to require you to take classes that aren’t tied to your major, I think they should help you deal with daily life. That’s why I came up with five classes that should be taught in school.

1. Money Management

This class is first on the list because there is a direct correlation between how you handle money and your peace of mine. The earlier you get smart about managing money, the less stressful your life will be. 

The main objectives of this course should be: 

• Learn the importance of savings accounts
• Develop a spending plan AKA budget that’s based on something other than checking you bank balance once a week.
• Learn why you need to make compound interest your friend instead of your enemy

2. Taxes

One of my favorite episodes of “That 70’s Show” is when Jackie gets her first paycheck. She goes to the manager and says “I don’t know who FICA is but that bitch stole like 10% of my money.” As the old saying goes the only sure-things in life are death and taxes, so every man needs to know about them. Also, nothing will influence how you vote more than what you know about taxes. 

The main objectives of this course should be:

• Know how the government spends your taxes, 
• Learn how to fill out a tax return
• Know the difference between tax avoidance (highly recommended) and tax evasion (a felony and something you should never do).

3. How to behave at a business dinner or holiday party

Parties and dinners are great ways for a man to make contacts and get face time with the bosses. The problem is going to a business dinner is way different than a frat party. There are few rules you need to learn and follow so you don’t get fired the day after the Christmas party. 

The main objectives of this course: 

• Learn the golden rule of alcohol consumption (never have more than one drink every 45 minutes), 
• Know how to dress for different social functions
• Understand why you should never challenge your boss to do shots.

4. Time Management 

Money may be number 1 on this list, but the truth is time is the most valuable asset you have. Every man gets 168 hours per week and no more. You can’t buy bonus hours. But some men get so much done in a week, it’s like they got extra hours. They don’t, they know it’s all in how you manage your168 hours. 

The main objectives of this course: 

• Develop the skills necessary to stay productive when there’s no one looking over your shoulder (like working from home), 
• Learn how often should you step away from the internet, social media and YouTube, 
• Know the difference between taking a break (highly recommended) and procrastination (will get your fired.)

5. Car Maintenance 

As you’ve probably figured out by now, a car is the second largest purchase a man will make. The good news is most cars are so good now, you can easily put 100,000 miles on one and it still be as reliable as when it was new. There are just a few basic maintenance items you need to stay on top of.

The main objectives of this course: 

• Learn The ONE thing guaranteed to make your car last longer or wear out way before it’s time, oil changes. Most cars now only require changing the oil every 10,000 miles so there’s no excuse to let this one slide, 
• Understand that rotating your tires every 5k miles takes 30 minutes and your tires will last twice as long.
• Learn how to keep you car clean.

 

Those 5 classes will do more to set up a man for success than these classes I’ve seen people waste their (or their parents) money on :rock climbing, kayaking, or weight lifting and you’ll still get your easy “A”.